When Gray's Surrender Their Dignity Embarrassment is Sure to Follow
"One is never so dangerous when one has no shame, than when one has grown too old to blush." - Marquis de Sade
The Old Gray Thinker is often railing against "The Retirement Brochure" - what it doesn't tell us and the lies that it does. There is, of course, no actual brochure. "The Brochure" is an implicit retirement package society has for us. Parceled out like breadcrumbs, we're expected to follow the script and accept the morsels doled out to us. As I approach the "official" age of retirement, the quantity of crumbs and the persistence of those doing the scattering have increased tenfold. Most days, including weekends, my phone log is filled with scammers and schemers intent on guiding me through the retirement rapids...for a price.
My snail mailbox is populated each day with as many as five pitches from Medicare advisors, financial planners, and insurance companies of one flavor or another. Each breadcrumb offering to soothe my fears, anxieties, needs, whatever...for a price. The stale bait remains on the hook while I spend more time on my phone blocking spam than I do actually talking.
Euphemistically, the trip to the mailbox is referred to as “taking out the garbage.” However, this pitch from the USPS email notice of what to expect in my snail mailbox gave me pause...
Hmmm.
What do you suppose the grandson is thinking about Grandpa? That he’s cool because he can barely stand on a skateboard? Or does he think Grandpa looks ridiculous? His expression looks more cringe than approving. “Wow, Grandpa. That’s straight heat. Your board control is next-level savage. Can I have my skateboard back now?”
I can imagine one of Grandpa’s nervous children just out of frame screaming “Dad! Get off that thing before you fall and break your other hip!”
What’s impressive about a Gray showing to a kid he can still do kid things?
Nothing.
Bonding behavior fail.
Kids can already do kid things. It would impress his grandsone more if Grandpa showed him how to do adult things competently and safely. The boy looks to be old enough to start learning that someday he’s going to have to make the transition into adulthood. The world needs more adults serving as solid models for how to behave as adults. Showing children that you’re still a child at age 65 is embarrassing at best. And if you’re dying your hair, dressing like a high schooler, and laboring to spit out juvenile jargon while struggling to keep your dentures in...well, that could serve as the definition of cringe.
Help them launch into the world and model how to move about as mature, competent adults rather than a pathetic Gray unwilling to acknowledge his age by seeking to fit in with the cool kids. Be the model they need, not the unintended humiliation you’re chasing.
If the thought of serving as a worthy model for the younger generations isn’t sufficient motivation, consider your own dignity. And by “dignity” I mean the sense of self-worth and self-respect that sets the foundation for peace of mind in later years. Strength, productivity, resilience, agency - these are the things society works to strip from your sense of dignity the older you get. Why help the process along?
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“When Gray’s Surrender Their Dignity Embarrassment is Sure to Follow” last updated on 2026.04.26.
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